NPMI Relationship/Joke Friday



Love is one of the strongest forces in human living. It flows within a person and then out towards others with one’s sphere of contact. It is a bond that can be made and can also be broken depending on what constitutes it. The elements of the bond determine the strength of it and this, in turn, determines it’s durability.
Love itself is a force that can bring both the strong and the weak together into a stable state whereby the weaknesses of the weak is being compensated for by the strength of the strong thus making both parties appear strong. It is a uniting force that can bring different parties that are not “perfect match” into a stable state of harmony. In fact, every relationship that must be durable and fruitful must be founded on love. So, it’s absence in relationships always breeds frictions and crisis.
Mark Twain defines love as “an irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.”
True, part of our human desires is the desire to be desired by others. It is always an uninteresting life experience to be in an environment where nobody pays attention to you. It is this desire to be desired that brings people into relationships and this is why we are social beings. Relationships birthed in the desire for one another are the connecting rods which make one a true partaker of life events. When you are not being genuinely loved by those within your sphere of contact, you feel disconnected from the real essence of life. Observation has shown that you are irresistibly drawn to those who desire you whether for their own good, for your good or for the common good. Even in marriage, whenever the attention and affection of both spouses are turned away from each other, the marriage begins to lose taste.

The practice of love is theoretically simple until you come to the reality of making it an attitude and a lifestyle. It comes with a lot of sacrifices and demands. The intricacies involved in understanding what makes love real and true makes it elusive and impracticable at times. The better you understand the concept, the better you are in loving and being lovable.
Often, the difficulties experienced in putting love to practice could actually stem from the intention of loving in the first place. And the key is:
The truth is, if you love a person because of what you expect from
him/her, the day he/ she fail to offer that thing probably because he/she don’t have it or have too little of it, your love for him/her may begin to wax cold.
You see, there are times we really expect too much from people that they could offer too little and this is often at the bottom of most
frustrations, disappointments, and heartbreaks suffered in most
You have to understand that we are humans with imperfections and weaknesses. No one has it all. So, instead of loving people because of what you expect from them, love them because you respect their revealed personality. Loving people for who they are and not who you are and what you expect from them will save you so many pains that plague most relationships. It will help you to give and invest in people without necessarily expecting a return from them. You may always be disappointed when you expect too much from people. Don’t try to change a human you didn’t create all in the name of love. Don’t expect people to behave the way you want;allow them to be the best of themselves.
However, you need to be guided by wisdom and discretion to know what and who deserves your heart. But first,you must set your priorities right. Know what you want as a person and relate with people in this light.

Yours always,
Emmanuel Oghenekaro Eyafimoni

Love is the foundation upon which all other things (trust,understanding, respect etc) are built…

An all-round Compatibility-test is very important in laying the foundation

Chosen Okay. Good answer

But don’t u think trust, understanding, respect, communication and understanding should be the foundation?

Abraham: Are all these things not borne out of love. I think they are ‘expressions of love’ and not mutually exclusive entities.

Beaulay: Personally, I think love is borne out of these things…u don’t just start loving immediately… U grow in love.

Abraham: I understand the English language doesn’t do justice to the word “love” unlike the Greek language.

Beaulay: In my opinion though, you should build trust, friendship, understanding, great communication first which now builds a foundation for love…Thank u

Abraham: How do you grow in love? What are the specific things you express that make you know you are growing in love?

I believe every descent human being should be treated with love; of course in varying degrees.

Chosen: Of course every human being should be treated with “genuine love” according to the bible which also tells us to “love our enemies” but that is not always the case as we all know.

So in its realistic and practical sense which is the angle @ which i’m coming from, “love is borne out of these things”.

Beaulay: Seeing someone and liking them is really really different from loving them.

There are no varying degrees of love: “Love is Love” in all ramifications.

Abraham: “Tomato is tomato” does not rule out the fact that there are several species of tomato.

In Greek, there is agape, phileo, eros etc. I consider love to be a spectrum.

That we have ‘difficulty’ in carrying out a ‘default setting’ because of society and circumstances does not make it less realistic and practical. The human mind never runs out of excuses.

The fact is you can’t give what you don’t have. People have abuse trust, respect etc.

Shelter is shelter be it tent, bungalow, duplex etc


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